Inspiring Stories

 

Articles Included:

·        Reason for Life

·        The Phoenix

·        How to be Happy

·        O'Hare

·        The Daffodil Principle

·        Quiet Courage

·        Hospital Charts

·        Youth Rally

·        Facts of Life

·        Funny Thoughts

·        Friends

·        A True Story—Packs a Pouch

·        Poor People

·        Refined Silver

·        UOA Prayer

·        Why Come?

·        Water or Coke

·        Open Letter to our Members

·        A Second Chance

·        United Ostomates

·        An Old Ladies Poem

·        If I Had My Life To Live Over

·        12 Rules of Life

·        You Thought I Wasn’t Looking

·        Time

·        Self-Esteem

·        Bonnie Bachman:  Reborn

 

Reason for Life

--New Life, Charlotte, GA

 

I don't know how to say it but sometimes it seems to me

That maybe we are stationed where God wanted us to be;

That the little place I'm filling is the reason for my birth,

And just to do the work I do—He sent me down to earth.

 

If god had wanted otherwise,

I reckon He'd have made me just a little different, of a worse or better grade.

And since God knows and understands all things of land and sea

I fancy that He knows He placed me just where He wanted me.

 

Sometimes I get to thinking, as my labors I review

That I should like a higher place with greater tasks to do;

But I come to the conclusion, when the envying is stilled

That the post to which God sent me is the post He wanted filled.

 

So I plod along and struggle in the hope when day is through

That I'm really necessary to the things God wants to do.

And there isn't any service I can give which I should scorn

For it may be just the reason God allowed me to be born.

 

The Phoenix

--The Beacon, Coos Bay, OR

 

The legend of the Phoenix was told and retold throughout the ages, even appearing in Greek and Chinese literature.  The bird was said to live for 500 years or more, to be consumed by fire by it's own act, and to rise in youthful freshness from it's own ashes.

 

For now his feathers were afire and the top of the palm tree burst into flame.  Now there was nothing left of the bird but a still glow atop the charred tree.  The glow took form and the color moved; sparks renewed, assumed the shape of the feathers, and the gentle desert breeze blended the sparks together into the new Phoenix, tall, iridescent, magnificent.  For now his rebirth was complete.  And as he rose from the flames, his song also rose like a silver clarion call, proclaiming his rebirth to the world.

 

Adopted as the symbol for the United Ostomy Association, the Phoenix represents a fiery symbol of the spirit and feeling underlying the growth of the Association.

 

For the ostomate, what more appropriate symbol?  From the ashes of despair and disease, from the fate of disability and death, from the ebb tide of physical and emotional being to the full tide of life—of hope—of health.

 

Reborn to a life of fulfillment—of dedication—of giving to others.  Although not ourselves immortal, we gain perhaps true immortality by giving of ourselves to others, so that we may live on in the hearts and minds of others.

 

As the symbol of the constant renewal of spiritual values, of the flames of love and compassion, of the season; spring of life, may the Phoenix serve as a glowing vibrant sign for each of us.

 

How to Be Happy

Adapted By The New Outlook

 

Sharpen your powers to observe.  You get more out of life if you stop and notice it.  Notice the beauty of nature.  Take delight in your physical surroundings.

 

Eliminate fear, jealousy, and self pity from you life as much as possible.  The first step is to recognize these deadly vices in your daily life.  We all have these to some extent and becoming aware of these for the purpose of rejecting them is a guarantee of happiness.

 

Count your blessings.  Positive thought can do a lot for every one of us.  God loves you.

 

Do something for others.  Sometimes when you are distressed, you concentrate too much on yourself and your situation.  When this happens, it is wise to do something for someone else.  Get your mind off of yourself.

 

Life itself can't give you joy, unless you really will it.  Life just gives you time and space.  It's up to you to fill it.

 

Yesterday's gone—Tomorrow's a mystery—Today's a gift.  That's why we call it the "present".

 

God always answers the prayer of the loving person, immediately, wonderfully and more completely than we image.  He always gives us an infinite amount of the best even when we ask for only a little.  

 

O'Hare

 

World War II produced many heroes.  One such man was Lieutenant Commander Butch O'Hare.  He was a fighter pilot assigned to an aircraft carrier Lexington in the South Pacific.

 

One day his entire squadron was sent on a mission.  After he was airborne, he looked at his fuel gauge and realized that someone had forgotten to top off his fuel tank.  He would not have enough fuel to complete his mission and get back to his ship.  His flight leader told him to return to the carrier.

 

Reluctantly he dropped out of formation and headed back to the fleet.  As he was returning to the mother ship, he saw something that turned his blood cold.  A squadron of Japanese bombers were speeding their way toward the American fleet.  The American fighters were gone on a sortie and the fleet was all but defenseless.  He couldn't reach his squadron and bring them back in time to save the fleet. Nor, could he warn the fleet of the approaching danger. 

 

There was only one thing to do.  He must somehow divert them from the fleet.  Laying aside all thoughts of personal safety, he dove into the formation of Japanese planes.  Wing-mounted 50 caliber's blazed as he charged in, attacking one surprised enemy plane and then another.  Butch weaved in and out of the now broken formation and fired at as many planes as possible until finally all his ammunition was spent.

 

Undaunted, he continued the assault. He dove at the planes, trying to at least clip off a wing or tail, in hopes of damaging as many enemy planes as possible and rendering them unfit to fly.  He was desperate to do anything he could to keep them from reaching the American ships.  Finally, the exasperated Japanese squadron took off in another direction.  Deeply relieved, Butch O'Hare and his tattered fighter limped back to the carrier. Upon arrival he reported in and related the event surrounding his return.  The film from the camera mounted on his plane told the tale.  It showed the extent of Butch's daring attempt to protect his fleet.  He had destroyed five enemy bombers.

 

That was on February 20, 1942, and for that action he became the Navy's first Ace of WWII and the first Naval Aviator to win the Congressional Medal of Honor.  A year later he was killed in aerial combat at the age of 29.  His home town would not allow the memory of that heroic action die.  And today, O'Hare Airport in Chicago is named in tribute to the courage of this great man.

 

Some years earlier there was a man in Chicago called Easy Eddie.  At that time, Al Capone virtually owned the city.  Capone wasn't famous for anything heroic. His exploits were anything but praiseworthy. He was, however, notorious for enmeshing the city of Chicago in everything from bootlegged booze and prostitution to murder.  Easy Eddie was Capone's lawyer and for a good reason.  He was very good!  In fact, his skill at legal maneuvering kept Big Al out of jail for a long time.  To show his appreciation, Capone paid him very well. 

 

Not only was the money big, Eddie got special dividends.  For instance, he and his family occupied a fenced-in mansion with live-in help and all of the conveniences of the day.  The estate was so large that it filled an entire Chicago city block.  Yes, Eddie lived the high life of the Chicago mob and gave little consideration to the atrocities that went on around him.  Eddy did have one soft spot, however.  He had a son that he loved dearly.  Eddy saw to it that his young son had the best of everything: clothes, cars, and a good education.  Nothing was withheld.  Price was no object.  And, despite his involvement with organized crime, Eddie even tried to teach him right from wrong. 

 

Yes, Eddie tried to teach his son to rise above his own sordid life.  He wanted him to be a better man than he was.  Yet, with all his wealth and influence, there were two things that Eddie couldn't give his son.  Two things that Eddie sacrificed to the Capone mob that he could not pass on to his beloved son: a good name and a good example.

 

One day, Easy Eddie reached a difficult decision.  Offering his son a good name was far more important than all the riches he could lavish on him.  He had to rectify all the wrong that he had done.  He would go to the authorities and tell the truth about Scar-face Al Capone.  He would try to clean up his tarnished name and offer his son some semblance of integrity. To do this he must testify against The Mob, and he knew that the cost would be great.  But more than anything, he wanted to be an example to his son.  He wanted to do his best to make restitution and hopefully have a good name to leave his son.

 

So, he testified.  Within the year, Easy Eddie's life ended in a blaze of gunfire on a lonely Chicago street.  He had given his son the greatest gift he had to offer at the greatest price he would ever pay.

 

I know what you're thinking.  What do these two stories have to do with one another?  Well, you see, Butch O'Hare...was...Easy Eddie's son.

 

The Daffodil Principle....

 

Several times my daughter had telephoned to say,  "Mother, you must come see the daffodils before they are over."  I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake Arrowhead. "I will come next Tuesday,"  I promised, a little reluctantly, on her third call.  Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and so I drove there.

 

When I finally walked into Carolyn's house and hugged and greeted my grandchildren, I said,  "Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in the clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see bad enough to drive another inch!" My  daughter smiled calmly and said,  "We drive in this all the time, Mother." "Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!"  I assured her.

 

"I was hoping you'd take me over to the garage to pick up my car."  "How far will we have to drive?" "Just a few blocks,"  Carolyn said.  "I'll drive.  I'm used to this."  After several minutes, I had to ask, "Where are we going?  "This isn't the way to  the garage!"  "We're going to my garage the long way,"  Carolyn smiled, "by way of the daffodils."  "Carolyn," I said sternly, "please turn around."  "It's all right, Mother, I  promise. You will never forgive yourself if  you miss this experience."

 

After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand-lettered sign that read, "Daffodil Garden." We got out of the car and each took a child's hand, and I followed Carolyn down the path. Then, we turned a corner of the path, and I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight. It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it down over the mountain peak and slopes. The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patterns-great ribbons and swaths of deep orange, white, lemon yellow, salmon pink, saffron, and butter yellow.  Each different-colored variety was planted as a group so that it swirled and flowed with its own unique hue.

 

There were five acres of flowers.  "But who has done this?" I asked Carolyn.  "It's just one woman," Carolyn answered.  "She lives on the property.  That's her home."  Carolyn pointed to a well kept A-frame house that looked small and modest in the midst of all that glory.  We walked up to the house. On the patio, we saw a poster.  "Answers to the  Questions I Know You Are Asking" was the headline.  The first answer was a simple one. "50,000 bulbs," it read. The second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and very little brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958."

 

There it was, The Daffodil Principle.  For me, that moment was a life-changing experience.  I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun-one bulb at a time-to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountain top.  Still, just planting one bulb at a time, year after year, had changed the world.  This unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived.

 

She had created something of ineffable indescribable magnificence, beauty, and inspiration.  The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration.  That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time, often one baby-step at a time, learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time.

 

hen we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We can change the world.  "It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through all those years.  Just think what I might have been able to achieve!" 

 

My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way.  "Start today," she said.  It's so pointless to think of the lost hours of yesterdays. The way to make learning a lesson of celebration instead of a cause for regret is to only ask, "How can I put this to use today?".

 

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another.  Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough and we'll be more  content when they are.  After that, we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with.  We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage.  We tell ourselves that  our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together,  when we get a nicer car, when we are able to go on a nice vacation, or when we retire.

 

The truth is there's no better time to be happy than right now.  If not now, when?  Your life will always be filled with challenges.  It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway.  Happiness is the way.  So, treasure every moment that you have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time with...and remember that time waits for no one. 

 

So, stop waiting...until your car or home is paid off, until you get a new car or home, until your kids leave the house, until you go back to school, until you finish school, until you lose 10 lbs., until you gain 10 lbs., until you retire…there is no better time than right now to be happy.  Happiness is a journey not a destination.  So work like you don't need money, love like you've never been hurt, and dance like no one's  watching.

 

Quiet Courage

By J. Engelbert Dunphy, M.D.

 

     I think we doctors, particularly surgeons, are not apt to realize--we see how well you are, we see how well you are doing, with what ease you appear to get along--and we fail to appreciate how much courage it has taken you to reach that point. 

     I think today is a day when the big pressure is being put on for the consumer to have something to say about medical care.  He/she wants to tell the doctor what the doctor should do.  Well, actually we have in your ostomy association one of the finest examples of what the consumer can and should do for the doctor.

     It is this attitude, I think, that makes a model for the medical profession and other groups to improve the care of patients with all kinds of diseases and particularly those which create handicaps for the patients.  The individuality of man is never more evident than when he/she faces some great personal crisis.  No matter who we are, or what the crisis is, we are seized by a terrible sense of aloneness.

     Fortunately, there is in a man a latent quality equal to any crisis.  It makes the weak strong and the strong steady.  More obvious in some, it is present in all men of good will.  This quality is courage.

     It is the quiet courage which endures stark fear and over-powering sorrow.  It is the courage of Roland before the dark tower and of Anne Frank in the attic, it is the courage to face the terrible, the unknown and the uncertain.  It is the virtue which the surgeon and physician see every day in the eyes of ordinary men for the first time when they realize they have some fatal or crippling disease.  It is an awful thing to learn that one must be blind or paralyzed or crippled.  Yet in some ways, the initial impact of having to live with an ostomy must be harder to face. 

     I have often thought this must be particularly true of the patient with ulcerative colitis who has fought a long, bitter and now an apparently losing battle with his/her disease.  On top of the aloneness of the crisis, there is apt to be superimposed a sense of failure and defeat.  How can he/she help but say: "Why should this happen to me?  What have I done to deserve this?  Who can help me in my aloneness?"  And the answer is always the same--no one--you must help yourself.

     You must never forget, however, that no matter how much better ostomies can be made and managed, the individual patient, when he/she first realizes what he/she must face, finds him/herself  alone.  The sympathetic reassurance of others who have faced the same thing, and the guidance and support of a skilled and compassionate surgeon are of inestimable value.  Yet, in the final analysis, the patient must face the issue himself  He must help himself.  Happily, history is now on his/her side.

     He/she can be assured that, like others before him/her, he/she will find within him/herself the quiet courage of men of good will.  And, once the crisis has been faced, he/she will find a rich and rewarding companionship among people like himself.  For what draws people with ostomies together is not their problems, but their courageous natures.  Although no ban or banners hail their victory, they have joined the ranks of men and women with dignity and courage.  And for their surgeons and physicians, it is an honor and a tremendous privilege to know them.

 

Hospital Charts

Actual Excerpts from Hospital Charts

 

·        She has no rigors or shaking chills, but

      husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

·        Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left

      side for over a year.

·        The patient is tearful and crying constantly.  She

      also appears to be depressed.

·        The patient has been depressed since she began

      seeing me in 1993.

·        Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.

·        Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year-old male,

      mentally alert but forgetful.

·        The patient refused autopsy.

·        The patient has no previous history of suicides.

·        Patient's medical history has been remarkably

      insignificant with only a 40-pound weight gain in the past three days.

·        The skin was moist and dry.

·        Occasional constant infrequent headaches.

·        Patient was alert and unresponsive.

·        Rectal examination revealed a normal-size thyroid.

·        She stated that she had been constipated for most

      of her life, until she got a divorce.

·        Examination of genitalia reveals that he is

      circus sized.

·        The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

·        The patient was to have a bowel resection.

      However, he took a job as a stockbroker instead.

·        Skin: somewhat pale but present.

·        Patient has two teenage children but no other

      abnormalities.

 

Youth Rally

(As a Chapter, we donate funds to help send a person to the annual UOA Youth Rally.  This is a letter we received from a teenage girl that due to our contribution was able to attend.)

                                                                                                                                               

Thank you for making it possible for me to attend the Youth Rally this year.  I look forward to the Rally more than anything else that I do during the year.  It gives me a chance to learn about myself; my disease; meet many interesting people, but most of all, see other people who are surviving.  The other people who attend do not allow any of their medical limitations to become mental limitations.

 

During my first year, I was shy and quiet.  It felt like I couldn't talk about my ostomy issues.  I thought there was no one else who really knew what it was like to be a fourteen year old girl with ulcerative colitis.  By the end of that camp, I had made close friends.  We are in contact throughout the year to support each other and just be friends.  As we talked about the things other people would never talk with me about, I became more confident in myself. 

 

This is my third year here.  I found myself helping first year campers become comfortable with just being themselves.  This will be my last year as a camper, but I can't wait to come back as a counselor next year.  I want to continue to learn and continue to help others cope with ostomy surgery.

 

Camp is a very special opportunity to be a normal person.  I find that I am not alone, and that there are other people just like me out there.  I no longer want my battle with  ulcerative colitis nor my ostomy issues to slow me down.  Thank you again for giving me the chance to experience this valuable trip.  With gratitude,

                                                                                                            Elizabeth Long

Facts of Life

 

            like you.

likely turned your back on the world.

it, but if you believe in yourself, you probably sooner or later will get it.

know.

 

Funny Thoughts

 

·        Women should not have children after 35.  Really...35 children are enough

·        Shopping tip: You can get shoes for 85 cents at bowling alleys.

·        After all is said and done, usually more is said than done.

·        I am a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I am perfect.

·        No one ever says "It's only a game," when their team is winning.

·        I gave my son a hint. On his room door I put a sign: CHECKOUT TIME IS 18

·        If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway?

·        How come we choose from just two people for president and 50 for Miss America?

·        On my first day of school my parents dropped me off at the wrong nursery. There I was …surrounded by trees and bushes.

·        Marriage changes passion...suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

·        I earn a seven-figure salary. Unfortunately, there's a decimal point involved.

·        Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.

·        Home is where you can say anything you like 'cause nobody listens to you anyway.

·        I live in my own little world, but it's ok, they know me here.

·        I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it.  I said, "Thyroid problem?"

·        I don't do drugs anymore 'cause I find I get the same effect just by standing up really fast.

·        Sign In Pet Store: "Buy one dog, get one flea..."

·        Dyslexia means never having to say that you're yrros.

·        If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the 'terminal'?

·        I see your IQ test results were negative.

·        Regular naps prevent old age...especially if you take them while driving.

·        I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected.

·        I think your problem is low self-esteem.  It is very common among losers.

·        The most precious thing we have is life.  Yet it has absolutely no trade-in value.

·        I have learned there is little difference in husbands, you might as well keep the first.

·        If life deals you lemons, make lemonade; if it deals you tomatoes, make Bloody Mary's.

·        Travel is very educational. I can now say "Kaopectate" in seven different languages.

 

Friends

--The Green Bay  News Review

 

The best known relief for mundane, everyday stress—the flat tire, breaking a dish, the batteries dying on the remote, and hundreds of other nits that pick at us—is nothing more complicated than someone to pal around with.

 

The basic human need for playmates—childhood or adult—serves us well, it seems, in helping us deal with day-to-day troubles.  We need emotional support from our friends in the stressful times of severe life situations, when some major life event occurs; such as, death of a loved one, losing a job or ostomy surgery.

 

In times of ordinary life, troubles are relieved more by companionship—going to a movie with a friend; visiting a museum with a buddy; and coming to a Chapter Meeting, etc..  In those situations, talking doesn’t reduce distress as much as doing something with an acquaintance.

 

In fact, talking too much about small troubles actually can make them worse.  What we need instead is distraction, something that gets our minds on something else.  A companion with shared interests is usually just the ticket.

 

A True Story—Packs a Pouch
By Goergene Whiteway

 

After years of struggle, I finally faced the inevitable and had surgery which resulted in an ileostomy.  I endured the same fears, depression and hopelessness common to anyone undergoing this type of traumatic procedure.  With the total support of my family, I faced each day of my hospitalization.

 

Finally, a milestone—I would get to see my 10 year-old daughter!  It meant walking all the way to the visiting area, but , rolling my IV stand and holding on to my sister-in-law, I knew I would make it

     My nurse placed a fresh ileostomy bag on me and I started my journey. Within a few minutes, I felt fluid draining down my leg and knew the bag had broken.  Back to my room.  Call the nurse.  Replace the bag.  Start again.

 

Halfway there, the bag broke again.  Is this what my future was to be? Was there something about me that caused the breakage?  I was in tears as the nurse placed a new bag on me.

 

When the third bag broke, my morale was completely destroyed.  My daughter was still waiting, crying now to see her mom.  A new nurse came in and in a matter of seconds was able to turn disaster into a quick and happy reunion with my badly shaken daughter.

 

What magic did this new nurse perform?  None.  But she did know that drainable pouches require a clip at the end to hold liquids in!

 

Yes, the first nurse had been “exposed” to ostomy care, but her skill was so minimal that she could not identify the various forms of pouches.  As a result, she inadvertently put me through 60 minutes of sheer hell.  Will I help promote familiarization training in our hospitals?  You bet!

 

Poor People?

Contributed by Jane Michnik

 

One day a father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing his son how poor people can be.

 

They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family. On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"

 

"It was great, Dad." "Did you see how poor people can be?" the father asked. "Oh Yeah" said the son. "So what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.

 

The son answered, "I saw that we have one dog and they had four.  We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.  We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.  Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.  We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.  We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.  We buy our food, but they grow theirs.  We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them."

 

With this the boy's father was speechless.  Then his son added, "Thanks dad for showing me how poor we are."

 

Too many times we forget what we have and concentrate on what we don't have. What is one person's worthless object is another's prize possession?

 

It is all based on one's perspective. Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks to God for all the bounty we have been provided by Him, instead of worrying about wanting more.  May God bless each and every one of you.  Take joy in all He has given each and every one of us, especially our friends.

 

Refined Silver

Contributed by Jane Michnik

                                               

There was a group of interfaith women that met for Bible study.  While studying they came across the Book of Malachi 3:3, where it says:  "He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver."

 

This verse puzzled the women, and they wondered how this statement applied to the character and nature of God.  One of the women offered to find out more about the process of refining silver and report back to the group.

 

The woman called up a silversmith who generously allowed her to watch him work.  She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity.

 

As she watched the silversmith work, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up.  He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire—where the flames were the hottest—as to burn away all the impurities.

 

She then asked the silversmith why he had to sit in front of the fire the entire time the silver was being refined.  The man said not only does he have to sit there, but that he must keep his eyes on it the entire time it is in the fire.  If the silver is left even a moment too long in the flames, it will be destroyed.

 

She was pensive and silent for a little while.  She asked the silversmith, "but how do you know when the silver is fully refined?"  He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's easy—when I see my image in it."

 

If today you are feeling the heat of the fire, remember that you are in the hands of God.  He has His eyes on you.  He will keep holding you and watching you until He sees His image in you.

 

UOA Prayer

-- St. Paul Ostomy Assn.

 

     Dear Lord…be with us always and make us ever mindful of the many blessings you have given us:  our homes, our jobs, our understanding families.  But most of all, make us ever mindful of the life, which has been given back to us.  Give us the courage to face its challenges daily.

     Dear Lord…make me a worthwhile member of this group by performing willingly and often the task  for which it was begun.  Let me never say that I am too busy to help someone in doubt or need.

     Thank you for bringing us together again and bestow, we pray, Your blessing on each of us here, until we meet again. 

(The opening prayer at the UOA, St. Paul founders first meeting in December 1954.)

 

Why Come?

 

Why should you come to your Chapter's meetings?  Here are some thoughts given to us by our members:

 

If no one came, there would not be an organization.  We would not know what was being developed to improve the care of ostomies.  We would not be aware of the new appliances being introduced.  Even if you are happy with your current system, you still want to know the state-of-the-art in ostomy products and services, don't you?

 

We are reminded by one member of how he  wore a three-piece, re-useable, black-rubber ostomy system—which worked years for him just fine—before coming to a meeting.  Then he discovered that the industry had developed high quality one- and two-piece disposable systems that are very secure, reliable, odor proof, easy to use and have a low profile.

 

You will virtually never see an ostomy advertisement on TV.  You need to be part of the Chapter and UOA to keep informed and educated.

 

Now, consider the new ostomate—you were once one too—who timidly comes to his/her first meeting.  Think about what it felt like to know that you weren't the only one in town with a "bag".    A new ostomate comes to a meeting and sees other ostomates—I mean you—looking stylish; living active, normal, happy and productive lives.  It gives them hope.

 

Bear in mind the manufacturers' executives who give of their free time by attending our meetings just because they want to help us.  They sincerely ask for our input on products and services.  But, we must be there to provide our thoughts and be advocates for our positions.

 

The ET's at each of our meeting completely volunteer their time for our good.  Not only do we learn from their presentations, but they are also available for consultation afterwards.

  

We gain the most from each other.  What may be "old hat" to you could be a most important discovery to a new ostomate or even to someone who has had an ostomy for several years.

 

Ostomates find strength in each other.  Therefore, it is important for you to come to our meetings.   We need you.

 

Water or Coke?

Researched by  Jane Michnik

 

This is really an eye opener...Water or Coke? We all know that water is important but I've never seen it written down like this before.

 

Water

·        70% of all Americans are chronically dehydrated.

·        In 37% of Americans, the thirst mechanism is so weak that it is often mistaken for hunger.

·        Even mild dehydration will slow down one's metabolism as much as 3%.

·        One glass of water shut down midnight hunger pangs for almost all of the dieters in a U-Washington study.

·        Lack of water is the number one trigger of daytime fatigue.

·        Preliminary research indicates that 8-10 glasses of water a day could significantly ease back and joint pain for up to 80% of sufferers.

·        A mere 2% drop in body water can trigger fuzzy short-term memory, trouble with basic math, and difficulty focusing on the computer screen or on printed page.

·        Drinking five, 12 ounce glasses of water daily decreases the risk of colon cancer by 35%; plus it can slash the risk of breast cancer by 50%; and one is 40% less likely to develop bladder cancer.

 

Coke

·        In many states (in the USA) the highway patrol carries two gallons of Coke in the truck to remove blood from the highway after a car accident.

·        You can put a T-bone steak in a bowl of coke and it will be gone in two days.

·        To clean a toilet: Pour a can of Coca-Cola into the toilet bowl and let the "real thing" sit for one hour, then flush clean. The citric acid in Coke removes stains from vitreous china.

·        To remove rust spots from chrome car bumpers: Rub the bumper with a rumpled-up piece of Reynolds Wrap aluminum foil dipped in Coke.

·        To clean corrosion from car battery terminals: Pour a can of Coca-Cola over the terminals to bubble away the corrosion.

·        To loosen a rusted bolt: Applying a cloth soaked in Coca-Cola to the rusted bolt for several minutes.

·        The active ingredient in Coke is phosphoric acid. Its pH is 2.8. It will dissolve a nail in about 4 days. Phosphoric acid also leaches calcium from bones and is a major contributor to the rising increase in  osteoporosis.

·        To carry Coca-Cola syrup (the concentrate) the commercial truck must use the Hazardous material place cards reserved for Highly corrosive materials.

·        The distributors of coke have been using it to clean the engines of their trucks for about 20 years!

·         

Open Letter

 

To our loyal members and supporters:

 

Chicago's North Suburban Chapter of UOA is your organization.  We will achieve our goals only if you:

Sit and talk to a new person at one of our meetings.  New people are here to meet other ostomates.  Smile and visit for awhile.

 

Volunteer for a committee.  We have a place for everyone.  Assist with our activities to make them better for you and your fellow ostomates.

 

Run for Chapter office rather than waiting to see who is elected.  We do make a difference.

 

Become a visitor rather than remembering how helpful your visitor was or how you didn't even have one because too few were available.

 

Come to our meetings.  It is better than just reading about them in the newsletter.  Plus, new ostomates have the opportunity to actually see experienced ostomates.  We want to show the them that we look, feel and smell good; have active fulfilling lives; and are grateful for our new life.

 

Submit questions and suggestions to our Board members.  Someone may never have thought of your observation.

 

Write an article for The New Outlook.  Most of our articles were researched and created by people just like you who want to tell a message.

 

Assist with a meeting or a function.  It is really a lot more fun when you do and you'll be surprised how many new friends you make.

 

Offer to do a program for our General Meeting.  You may have an idea and the people to implement it that can turn lives around.

 

Bring a new member to a meeting.  If you know of an ostomate, bring him/her with you.

 

Our Chapter welcomes all well-intentioned people and admission to our meetings is free.  We are a collection of individuals, not a handful of members, medical advisors or equipment suppliers.  If we are to thrive and grow, it will only be because of the desire of each and every one of you. 

      

A Second Chance

--The Optomist—Seattle, WA

 

Sure you were shocked.  You were depressed.  Who wasn't?  You thought, "how am I going to get accustomed to this thing?"  "What will my life be like?"  Didn't we all have similar thoughts?  Monopolize the bathroom when changing an appliance; use up too much valuable time primping; feel embarrassed; worry about our diet; be overly concerned about how we smell and odors and what other people would think, etc.  Didn't we all have some of these challenges?

 

Sure we resent what happened to us, but we can't be resentful and grateful at the same time.  We can't change what already happened, but we certainly can do something about the future.

 

Living is like playing poker—it isn't the cards you hold, but how you play them that makes the difference between winning and losing.  We are not invalids.  We don't need pity or sympathy or special considerations or concessions.  We are normal, capable people.

 

The ostomy is yours to do with as you wish.  You have a choice to take either of two paths, and the decision is yours alone.  You can refuse to accept it; feel sorry for yourself; be bitter; be resentful; withdraw from society; suffer the loss of many of the fine things life holds for you; or you can accept it.

 

You can develop a good attitude and go on to live a happy and productive life.  You can enjoy the extra time God has granted you to continue doing the things you did before surgery.

 

The proper training of the mind and body is not an easy job.  Nature has not endowed all of us with the same ability to make correct decisions.  Some people find it easy to look at a situation from all angles and decide what to do.  Others, because of a lack of knowledge or because of emotions, resentments, habits, etc., find it difficult to make a correct decision.

 

 Ostomy surgery—thank you modern medical science—has provided us with a rare gift—the gift of a second chance, a chance to live, a chance not given to everyone.  An ostomy—any type—is not a handicap, it is a new method of elimination—a life-saving device.  Be encouraged.  Accept your ostomy.  Prove to yourself that you can adjust better than anyone else.  To find happiness, we must think about what we owe ourselves, others, the world and God, rather than what life owes us.

 

Let us give thanks for every precious moment; be thankful that we have been helped; be thankful that we now have the opportunity to help others.  Let us count our blessings.  Let us thank God we are alive.

 

Reason for Life

--New Life, Charlotte, GA

 

I don't know how to say it but sometimes it seems to me

  That maybe we are stationed where God wanted us to be;

That the little place I'm filling is the reason for my birth,

  And just to do the work I do—He sent me down to earth.

 

If god had wanted otherwise,

  I reckon He'd have made me just a little different, of a worse or better grade.

And since God knows and understands all things of land and sea

  I fancy that He knows He placed me just where He wanted me.

 

Sometimes I get to thinking, as my labors I review

  That I should like a higher place with greater tasks to do;

But I come to the conclusion, when the envying is stilled

  That the post to which God sent me is the post He wanted filled.

 

So I plod along and struggle in the hope when day is through

  That I'm really necessary to the things God wants to do.

And there isn't any service I can give which I should scorn

  For it may be just the reason God allowed me to be born.

 

United Ostomates

--GB News Review

 

Prior to 1962, there was no United Ostomy Association.  At one time, there weren’t any off-the-shelf appliances available through many retailers to collect waste.  Early ostomates tell how they cemented rubber gloves, leather pouches, hot water bottles, cigar boxes or tin cans to their abdomens.  We read about a lady who had a successful urostomy, but didn't know about UOA.  For three years she used gauze to absorb the urine coming from it.  She didn't leave the house.

 

It was UOA that worked with manufacturers to help develop modern ostomy systems, barriers and pouches that we now we have so readily available and take for granted.  It was the UOA that testified before Congress to help pass Public Law 92-603, October 20, 1972, providing ostomy supplies through Medicare, and in April 2002 worked to help make reimbursements easier.  Congress also removed the tax from all ostomy supplies through our lobby.

 

 It was the many dedicated workers at UOA that gave of their talent in forming the over 400 local chapters with membership of more than 25,000 in the U.S. alone.  UOA helps new ostomates as well as those who have had their ostomies for years.

 

When one has lived with a stoma five years or more, changing an appliance is just another routine like brushing one's teeth.  But think back to when you first found out your were going to be an ostomate.  You had a hundred questions:  Can I drive a car?  Can I play golf?  Can I swim?  Will I ever be able to return to work?  How will I live with this thing?  Every hour you were awake you had another question.

 

At one time, we had no chapters, suppliers, manufacturers or ET's, and there was nobody to provide answers to these basic quality-of-life questions.  Thanks to the generous people who share the vision of UOA with our thousands of dedicated members, this has changed.

 

Every ostomate who is living has a debt to repay to the people who went before us paving the way in improving our quality-of-life.  The debt is there, whether you pay it or not, is up to you.  Think about it.  If each of us just attend monthly meetings, sharing our experiences and offering emotional support to others we can help repay the debt we each owe.

 

An Old Lady's Poem

Contributed by our friend, Jane Michnik

 

Last year, when an old lady died in the geriatric ward of a small hospital near Dundee, Scotland, it was felt that she had nothing left of any value.  Later, when the nurses were going through her meager possessions, they found this poem.

 

Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and distributed to every nurse in the hospital. One nurse took her copy to Ireland. The old lady's sole bequest to posterity has since appeared in the Christmas edition of the News Magazine of the North Ireland Association for Mental Health. A slide presentation has also been made based on her simple, but eloquent, poem.  This little old Scottish lady, with nothing left to give to the world, is now the authoress of this anonymous" poem winging across the Internet. It is proof that we all leave "some footprints in time"...

 

What do you see, nurses, what do you see?

What are you thinking when you're looking at me?

A crabby old woman, not very wise,

Uncertain of habit, with faraway eyes?

Who dribbles her food and makes no reply.

When you say in a loud voice, "I do wish you'd try!"

Who seems not to notice the things that you do,

And forever is losing a stocking or shoe...

Who, resisting or not, lets you do as you will,

With bathing and feeding, the long day to fill...

Is that what you're thinking? Is that what you see?

Then open your eyes, nurse; you're not looking at me.

I'll tell you who I am as I sit here so still,

As I do at your bidding, as I eat at your will.

I'm a small child of ten...with a father and mother,

Brothers and sisters, who love one another.

A young girl of sixteen, with wings on her feet,

Dreaming that soon now a lover she'll meet.

A bride soon at twenty—my heart gives a leap,

Remembering the vows that I promised to keep.

At twenty-five now, I have young of my own,

Who need me to guide and a secure happy home.

A woman of thirty, my young now grown fast,

Bound to each other with ties that should last.

At forty, my young sons have grown and are gone,

But my man's beside me to see I don't mourn.

At fifty once more, babies play round my knee,

Again we know children, my loved one and me.

Dark days are upon me, my husband is dead;

I look at the future, I shudder with dread.

For my young are all rearing young of their own,

And I think of the years and the love that I've known.

I'm now an old woman...and nature is cruel;

'Tis jest to make old age look like a fool.

The body, it crumbles, grace and vigor depart,

There is now a stone where I once had a heart.

But inside this old carcass a young girl still dwells,

And now and again my battered heart swells.

I remember the joys, I remember the pain,

And I'm loving and living life over again.

I think of the years...all too few, gone too fast,

And accept the stark fact that nothing can last.

So open your eyes, nurses, open and see,

Not a crabby old woman; look closer...see ME!!

An Old Lady's Poem

 

If I Had My Life To Live Over

 

12 Rules of Life

Adapted By The New Outlook

 

·        Never give yourself a haircut.

·        You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape.

       If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40.  If

       it moves and shouldn't, use the tape.

·        The five most essential words for a healthy relationship are "I apologize" and "you are right."

·        Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

·        Never pass up an opportunity to pee.

·        If someone says that you are too good for them...believe them.

·        Learn to pick your battles; ask yourself, "Will this matter one year from now?  How about one month?  One week?  One day?"

·        When you make a mistake, make amends immediately.  It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm.

·        If you woke up breathing, congratulations!  You  have another chance!

·        Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because of a bad or former relationship just might mean that the other person was right about you.

·        Work is good, but it's not that important.  Money is nice, but you can't take it with you.  Anything we have isn't really yours.  We just borrow it while we're here...even our kids.

·        And finally... Be really good to your family and friends. You never know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan.

 

You Thought I Wasn’t Looking

Forwarded By Jane Michnik

 

     A message every adult should read, because children are watching you and doing as you do, not as you say.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately wanted to paint another one.

     When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you feed a stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind to animals.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you take my favorite cake for me and I learned that the little things can be the special things in life.

     When you thought I wasn't looking I heard you say a prayer, and I knew there is a God I could always talk to and I learned to trust in God.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you make a meal and take it to a friend who was sick, and I learned that we all have to help take care of each other.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you give of your time and money to help people who had nothing and I learned that those who have something should give to those who don't.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you take care of our house and everyone in it and I learned we have to take care of each other and family.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw how you handled your responsibilities, even when you didn't feel good and I learned that I would have to be responsible when I grow up.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw tears come from your eyes and I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it's all right to cry.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw that you cared and I wanted to be everything that I could be.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I learned most of life's lessons that I need to know to be a good and productive person when I grow up.

     When you thought I wasn't looking, I looked at you and wanted to say, "Thanks, for all the things I saw when you thought I wasn't looking."

 

Time

Adapted By The New Outlook

 

There is a bank that credits your
account each morning with $86,400.
It carries over no balance from day to day.
Every evening deletes whatever part of the
balance you failed to use during the day. What
would you do? Draw out ALL OF IT, of
course!!!

Each of us has such a bank. Its name is TIME.
Every morning, it credits you with 86,400
seconds.  Every night it writes off, as lost,
whatever of this you have failed to invest to good
purpose.  It carries over no balance. It allows no
overdraft.

Each day it opens a new account for you.
Each night it burns the remains of the day.
If you fail to use the day's deposits, the
loss is yours.

There is no going back. There is no
drawing against the "tomorrow."
You must live in the present on today's
deposits. Invest it so as to get from it the
utmost in health, happiness, and success!
The clock is running. Make the most of today.

To realize the value of ONE YEAR,
ask a student who failed a grade.

To realize the value of ONE MONTH,
ask a mother who gave birth to a premature
baby.

To realize the value of ONE WEEK,
ask the editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize the! Value of ONE HOUR,
ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.

To realize the value of ONE MINUTE,
ask a person who missed the train.

To realize the value of ONE-SECOND,
ask a person who just avoided an accident.

To realize the value of ONE MILLISECOND,
ask the person who won a silver medal in the
Olympics.

Treasure every moment that you have! And
treasure it more because you shared it with
someone special, special enough to spend your
time.

 

Self Esteem

By D. Shannon, RN/ET, GB News Review

 

     Self-esteem is defined as to respect or to favorably regard one’s self.  Generally, a person sees in him/herself what he/she wants to see.  It makes a great difference what you want to see.

     In other words, your viewpoint about yourself really matters.  In times of adversity, such as illness, many people show disappointment or defeat.  Actually, when things go adversely, we may be allowed feelings of depression, guilt, anger and denial.  Some short periods of grieving are allowable and healthy.

     Coping with these feelings are gradual.  In addition, the person who has misfortune can turn it into opportunity.  Your handicaps, your deficiencies, your frustrations and your defeats may be the very means by which you grow into a much stronger person with even greater self-esteem.  Yet, no one is justified in sitting back and forever assuming him/herself defeated and unworthy to others. 

     One way to gain self-esteem is to look away from yourself and to look at the needs of others.  Our inner resources are far stronger than we suspect when they are exercised.  There are internal powers at your command that will enable you to face the adversities in your life.

 

Bonnie Bachman:  Reborn

By Billie Bachhuber

 

     Bonnie Bachman is attractive, happy, active...and glowing with good health.  Bonnie is an ostomate.  (Bonnie was one of the first presidents of the North Suburban Chapter of the United Ostomy Association.)  Mrs. Bachman lives life with special verve and gratitude.

     “Except for heavy contact sports like football, of which I never played anyway, I have absolutely no restrictions because of my health,” she reported, bubbling with spirit.  This was not always true for the red-haired peppy Buffalo Grove homemaker.

     Because Bonnie has had an ileostomy—surgery to remove the colon, and in her case, also part of the small bowel and rectum—she is an ostomate.  That means she wears an appliance attached to her skin covering a stoma which eliminates body wastes.

     A minute or two, whenever I go to the bathroom to urinate, is all the time it takes to dispose of such wastes, she explained.  And she changes the lightweight, odor-proof, plastic, ostomy appliance every five days, following the procedure necessary for her personal needs.

     No one could possibly know Bonnie is an ostomate unless she chose to tell.  She does.  She says, because she hopes sharing her experience will benefit other ostomates—and educate the public to understand ostomies—the aim of her Chapter of the United Ostomy Association.

     Bonnie elaborated: 

·        The colostomy, for instance, in which an opening in the colon is performed is usually because of cancer, birth defect or injury. 

·        The ileal conduit—a urostomy—is isolation or removal of the bladder usually because of cancer, disease or injury.  The ureters from the kidneys are implanted with an isolated six to eight-inch section of the small intestine which opens through the abdominal wall for emission of liquid wastes. 

·        And the ileostomy, Bonnie’s operation, is the removal of the entire colon because of the disease ulcerative colitis.  It can also be performed for birth defects and injury; etc.

     Because of complications, her surgery was more extensive, she said.  Bonnie suffered about eight years from worsening pain, diarrhea, minimal appetite and severe weight loss.  She developed fistulas and hemorrhoids, becoming anemic from resultant loss of blood.  On a frightening seesaw of attack and recovery, she spent years—weeks at a time—in and out of the hospital.

     Her illness eventually diagnosed as regional enteritis, Bonnie recovered with the help of antibiotics and gave birth to a healthy son, Bradley in 1969.  But for Bonnie and husband Bill, a field engineer with Peterson Enterprises of Glenview, joy at Bradley’s birth didn’t last.  Another painful attack and Mrs. Bachman was back to the hospital for surgery to remove fistulas.

     “But that wasn’t the answer and eventually I was begging for an ileostomy,” she recalled.  The operation over and health restored, Bonnie says she truly feels reborn.  “If I had know the before and after, I would have had the operation five years ago!”

     Now that the bad times are behind her, Mrs. Bachman can’t get enough of everyday enjoyment.  Two months after surgery she was spading and weeding her flower gardens, a favorite hobby.  She was also a “motor mom” for her son’s kindergarten class.  “I taught motor facilitation, functioning as a sort of gym teacher,” she explained.

     Bonnie continues to crewel, a pastime she started during long hospital stays.  She’s made samplers for all her nieces and nephews, a wedding sampler for her sister  and an assortment for her own neatly kept home, including several with nursery rhyme themes for Bradley’s room.

     To help appease her grand new appetite, she attended gourmet cooking classes and she and Bill joined a neighborhood gourmet dinner club.  “Friends and relatives got ecstatic during the holidays when I sampled everything!  I had a ball!” she recalled. 

     Bonnie now bowls in a league, takes golf lessons, goes to the beach and plans to travel.  She and Bill have already been to Jamaica and to Europe.  Right now her attention and her family’s are focused on the foster children who have just come to live with the Bachmans, two little sisters, one two years old and one eight months.  “ I can have more children,” Bonnie explained, “but we decided to share our home with foster children at present.”

     Mrs. Bachman’s whole-hearted acceptance of ostomy and adjustment to normal living were not accomplished alone, and she’s grateful to “some very special people.”  First, of course, her husband whose love and moral support helped her through the long difficult illness and recovery.  An to her doctor, who took time to explain the illness and surgery to her and Bill.  “And most of all for treating me with consideration as a person,” said Bonnie.

     She also acknowledged the emotional and physical help of Mrs. Marilyn Tousignant, enterostomal therapist at Holy Family Hospital in Des Plaines.  In 1973, Mrs. Tousignant was the only such therapist in the northwest suburbs.  “I don’t know what I would have done without Marilyn,” said Bonnie.

     She’s also grateful to the trained ostomate volunteer who came to see her after surgery.  “She visited me when I was sick and depressed.  Seeing her—so vitally alive, attractive and well dressed—started me on the way to recovery.”

     Now Bonnie wants to volunteer in the same way.  That’s what the North Suburban Chapter of the United Ostomy Association is all about, ostomates helping ostomates. 

     Editor’s note:  This article first appeared in the Chicago Tribune on August 4, 1975.  It seemed so relative to some of the same issues we face today, I thought it would be an interesting article for all of you to read—probably for the first time.      

 

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